It's been over a month since my last blog post, and I desperately wish that wasn't the case...for a multitude of reasons. First, for those who do not know, my mom has been battling and dealing with complications from cancer since last May when she was diagnosed. More recently her condition has taken a major turn for the worst and she has reached the end of her fight. Whatever happens now is 100% in God's hands. For the past three weeks she has been hospitalized at UW Medical Center in Seattle, but yesterday she was able to be taken home. With Hospice and Option Care services, the main goal is to keep her comfortable and happy until the Lord calls her home. We are SO happy that she's home and that we can be with her so much more now that we don't have the long trek to and from Seattle every day. She seems happy to be surrounded by all her family, and I just pray that her remaining days are full of comfort and peace. Only God knows what is in store for her and our family, and even though I can't understand why He is making my mom suffer, I can only trust and be faithful. We do feel confident that He has prepared us girls, my dad, our husbands, and our children for what's to come. A huge thank you from my family and I for all of the wonderful things and services you have offered us over the past few weeks and in the future. I haven't had to cook dinner (unwillingly at least) for a good three weeks, and there are no signs of that stopping either. I haven't had to worry about work, my kids, or my house either. A lot of that is due to my amazing husband, but also a large portion is because people are so giving and self-less. I so much love you all.
Even though it's hard for me to focus on anything more than my mom and her care, I have found joy and reprieve from the occasional day at home with the kids, or evening with Rob. These pictures are very random happenings from the last month, but they make me smile at a time when my smiles are few and far between. Life after all, continues to go on...even when we wish we could just press the pause button and hold things still for a few moments.
Lastly, I have been wanting to share something that Jack reminded me of the other day. Whenever I feel sad that I will lose my mom and not know how to go on without her, I need to remind myself of this. In reaction to some tears and an honest conversation about death with Jack, he reminded me that "Mom, it will only be a little while that you won't get to see Grammy, and then Jesus will say, 'Joelle, it's time to come to Heaven' and then guess what? You'll get to see your mom again!" I am so blessed to have a faith that no one or nothing can touch, but also so blessed that my child has that faith as well. That "makes my heart so happy"...another Jack-ism:)
9 comments:
Oh wow Joelle....I'm soo sorry to hear about your Mom. I can't even imagine what you guys are going through. Losing my Mom is one of my worst fears and my hear breaks for you and your sisters. I will be praying for you all in this tough time and am so thankful you have a good support system helping you out. Please let me know if there's anything I can do. Love and hugs, Brandi Bailey
i love you joelle!
Prayers to your entire family...I have been following your blog & caring pages regarding your mom. I graduated with Beth & Lisa. So sorry to hear about your mom...prayers to your entire family.
Love you Day Family...The pictures are definitley something to smile about, we are so lucky to share an "alley" with you guys :)
Love you Joelle. You know I am always here. I am a phone call away. I wish I was closer. Your whole family is on my heart and in my prayers.
We feel very fortunate to have shared a rare smile with you during this tough time. Your faith, perseverance and care are inspirational. You and your family fill my thoughts and prayers daily. Despite the engulfing sadness, it is so nice to see the joy that remains in your life right now.
Oh Joelle. I wish so badly that this whole situation were different. I am so sad for you girls, for your families, for your dad... but I know you will hold on strong to your faith. And I am so thankful that when it is time for your mom to go she will experience the complete peace and glory of heaven. Also, I am thankful we as Christians know we will see these we hold so dear again. Your son got it soooo right! I am keeping up with your family through Natasha. She loves you and looks forward to spending time with you this summer! I am sending you my love and prayers!
Hi Joelle - its Abby Allen, I was a bridesmaid in Tory's wedding with you. Tory gave me the address to your blog and updated me on your Mom. I am so sorry that you and your family have to go through this amd so sorry your Mom has to experience such terrible pain. You have such incredible faith and I know the Lord will take wonderful care of your Mom as well as you and your family. I am thinking of you!
I am so sorry Joelle for what you guys are going through right now. I know exactly how it feels and it makes me so sad to hear you talk about the exact same feelings I felt only 2 months ago. Although it is the hardest thing you are doing, enjoy every minute with your mom, there is nothing else you can do. Like you said in your blog, in some way God has prepared your family for this and he will help you through it. Please know that I pray for you many times a day and think of you very often throughout the day. Someone told me while my mom was dying to picture her bed as God's hands. He is holding her and caring for her until her moment to join him. I am so sorry... it just isn't fair... Kelli Baar
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